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It Was Month 4.
Four months after welcoming my daughter into the world and I was deep in the trenches of newborn life with a toddler by my side. My son wanted to play. My daughter would only sleep on my chest. I was running on fumes — pumping on a schedule, managing bath time, story time, dinner, and every other invisible thing that comes with being a mom of two. That particular night I looked around and thought, something has to give. And it wasn’t going to be me.
That was the moment I realized I needed grace more than I needed a perfect routine.
What Mom Guilt Was Telling Me
Mom guilt is loud. And relentless.
It told me that bath time had to go a certain way. That pumping sessions had to last exactly this long. That I needed to eat this, do that, play for this long, cook dinner like this. It painted this picture of a mom who had it all together, a set schedule, a perfect system, a seamless routine.
And I was none of those things.
The constant pressure of trying to be everything to everyone will lead you straight to burnout. Most mothers are fighting this battle daily, the endless what’s next, the invisible checklist that never gets fully checked off. We’re running hard and pouring from cups that have been empty for a long time.
The Night Grace Found Me
That night at month 4 I didn’t find grace in a perfectly planned quiet time. I found it crying through worship music while my daughter slept peacefully on my chest, finally at rest because mama was there.
In that moment something shifted. A silent and calm spirit washed over me and I just knew everything was going to be okay if I would just release it. The worry. The perfection. All the things.
I heard Christ is My Firm Foundation and I wept. Not from defeat, but from surrender. I realized in that moment that I am nothing without Jesus. He is the glue that holds this motherhood journey together. And from that night forward Grace became non negotiable.
Now let me be honest with you, it is not easy. It is truly a consistent battle to let go. But weirdly? When you do, you feel so much better.
What a Grace Pillar Actually Looks Like
Grace as a pillar doesn’t mean you have everything together. It means you start your day anchored before the chaos begins.
For me that looks like:
- Reading scripture before the house wakes up, my Bible is the first thing I reach for every morning
- Spending 5 intentional minutes setting my intention with my Five Minute Journal on my most chaotic mornings this is my grace in 5 minutes flat
- Praying and asking God for strength and wisdom before my feet hit the floor
- Carving out intentional time weekly through the Thrive Five, whether that’s attending small group, serving at Sunday service, joining a prayer call or simply sitting in quiet Bible time with my coffee
The Thrive Five Grace pillar gives me one focused goal each week to keep my spirit fed. Because when Grace is leading, everything else follows.
Why Grace Has to Be at the Center
Here’s what I know for sure, the Thrive Five framework doesn’t work if Grace is not at its core.
Without it my weeks are easily thrown off. My energy shifts. Anxiety packs on. The daily pressure becomes unbearable. But when I start from a place of grace — when I grab my coffee, open my Bible and set intentional time proactively, something in me settles. It’s that quiet reminder that girl, God’s got this.
Grace is the pillar that gives me permission to say, if I can’t, if I don’t want to, if something comes up, it is completely okay.
A Permission Slip for You Mama
Give yourself permission to let go and let God.
You are a superwoman. But you are also human. Stop trying to conquer the world and start experiencing the grace that God so freely gives you.
It’s difficult at first. But little by little, day by day, be intentional and realistic about what you can accomplish. And if something doesn’t get done? Whopty do! 😂
No but seriously, lead with grace first. Always.
On my hard days now I shrug, pick up whatever puzzle pieces I have and keep moving. Because as long as I am raising my children intentionally I am happy. And when I look back at that month 4 version of myself, crying through worship music, running on fumes, trying to be everything, I whisper:
Girl, hug yourself. You are doing great. God chose you!
Ready to Add Grace to Your Weekly Routine?
The Thrive Five Weekly Reset Guide has a Grace pillar built right in, with space to set one intentional spiritual goal each week. It’s free and it takes less than 10 minutes to use.
👉🏽 Grab your free Thrive Five Weekly Reset Guide here → Free Guide Here
Looking for tools to anchor your own Grace pillar? Shop my personal Grace pillar favorites → My Favs
We’re blending this life together, one intentional moment at a time. 🤎
Beautiful post!
I love your lovingly gently reminder to put God first and the rest will fall into place.
I have been in your shoes and I found myself remembering what that felt like so many years ago. I’m on the backend now but I still remember.
Absolutely! Thank you!
I started writing down one thing at the end of every day — what I actually managed to do. Not a to-do list, not plans. Just one small win. It’s surprising how quickly it shifts your perspective.
It sure does shift your perspective because that means you’ve accomplished something daily! Whoohoo!!
This was such a beautiful and encouraging read. My heart needed this reminder. God is so good! Thank you for sharing!
Thank you for your kind words!
What an encouraging post! I love the idea of anchoring your day before the chaos starts. I need to be more intentional about getting to my Bible sooner in the day!
Thank you! Grabbing my Bible just autosets the tone for my days.